TDOC, Chapter 7: A Good Man is Hard to Find

Some people seem to have the attitude that if they conform to all the high standards of courting, refrain from having any relationships while in high school, and don’t act in any way that is geared to attract the attention of the opposite sex, that God is therefore obligated to create their ideal wife or husband made-to-order, and promptly drop him or her off on their doorstep the day after high school graduation. This is perhaps one of the saddest things about the whole thing, and I don’t want to talk about it much because it makes me really depressed. And anyway I’m sure that if you have actually made it this far in the essay, you’re probably really wanting me to wrap it up. Suffice it to say that the immediate appearance of a potential spouse who will satisfy both your parent’s expectations and your own basic emotional needs is a blatant fiction. In my case, for example, there has always been a very definite lack of potential spouses, ideal or otherwise, but I know that even if one did show up, I would never want to marry the kind of guy that genuinely believes in courtship. But neither would I want to ask a guy to formulate our entire relationship around a process that he does not genuinely believe in. But, obviously, my parents would never let me have a relationship with a guy that is not a courtship relationship. And thus the vicious cycle continues.